Presbyterian Pastors Vow
To Fight to the Finish

KANSAS CITY, Mo. (AP) -- America looks to next Monday night to settle the nation's college basketball championship. But local fans are looking to a semifinal game Saturday to determine the winner that really matters.
Jack Cabaness, of Second Presbyterian Church, and Brian Ellison, of Parkville Presbyterian Church, are neck-and-neck, head-to-head, back-to-back, belly-to-belly as they square off for the coveted Pint Night and Friends First Annual Tournament Pool trophy.
Ellison's PTS Calvinists entry will win if Maryland beats Kansas Saturday night. Cabaness and the Park Lane Protectors win with the Jayhawks.
Ellison was talking smack when he learned of his position in the pool.
"I knew I had a strong entry," said Ellison, just emerging from a morning prayer service. "I'm just surprised that it's Jack I'm competing with at this level of competition."
Cabaness, known for his low-key but sly approach to competition, had a different take.
"He can talk all he wants," Cabaness said of the petulant Ellison. "I respect him as a competitor. He made fun of my irrational exuberance for the Texas teams. Of course, he was right about that, but anyway. Still, I think there's something to be said thoughtful reflection on the necessity of.... What was I talking about again?"
Scott Phillip's Cornhuskers entry, inspite of Nebraska's physical proximity to both Oklahoma and Indiana, fell 50 points short of the tie for the lead. Becky Capps' Parkville Cappuccino, while nobly named, faded in the regional final round.
Observers are cautioning that the wild card remains Rocky Supinger's entry. While indicating his participation in the pool, Supinger has not disclosed his tournament picks or his standing in the results. Indeed, even the name of his entry is unknown.
Anonymous pictures were posted of Supinger this week on the internet. At a pirated site within the Princeton Theological Seminary community, Supinger was shown wearing only a mustache. It is possible that the ensuing controversy has kept him from following his tournament entry. Supinger could not be reached for comment.